Have you tried everything, but you still can’t make sobriety stick? Or maybe you are sober, but you feel like there should be something more to your new sober life? There are many paths to getting sober, but whatever path you choose, quitting drinking is only the beginning. Tim has over a decade of sobriety and has gone through the journey from rehab to 12-step programs, to finally discovering his own path to recovery and happiness. He has transformed from the daily battle of trying to stay sober to learning to love himself and his life so much that he...
Fri, March 14, 2025
After months of very hard reflection, I have made the tough decision that I need to take a break to breathe and refocus. This wasn't an easy decision—I've poured my heart into creating content that helps others navigate sobriety while discovering joy in everyday moments. But sometimes, we need to follow our own advice about balance and self-care. Thank you for being part of this journey and for understanding this break isn't necessarily goodbye, as I hope I can return with renewed energy and purpose. Your support means everything, and I'm grateful for each of you who've welcomed my voice into your lives. Until next time, keep living sober and happy.
Fri, March 07, 2025
Does the idea of "never drinking again" feel overwhelming or even terrifying? In this episode, we unpack why thinking about sobriety as a "forever" commitment creates anxiety, perfectionism, and fear—and how reframing your mindset can set you free. Learn practical techniques like time-chunking, shifting your language, and focusing on today rather than forever. You'll walk away feeling empowered, not trapped, and ready to embrace sobriety one manageable step at a time.
Fri, February 28, 2025
Are you focused only on how many days you've been sober? There's so much more to celebrate in recovery! In this episode, we explore why counting days is just the beginning of measuring your growth. Learn about the meaningful milestones that don't come with chips or coins – from rebuilding relationships to finding inner peace. Discover how celebrating these "invisible victories" can strengthen your recovery journey and help you recognize just how far you've truly come. Listen now to redefine what progress means in your sobriety story.
Fri, February 21, 2025
In this episode, we’re diving deep into the power of identity and how the way you see yourself shapes your recovery. We’ll talk about why continuing to call yourself an alcoholic may be reinforcing the very struggles you’re trying to escape. I’ll share insights from my own journey, including a life-changing realization I had at a Tony Robbins event, and why shifting your identity from "I am an alcoholic" to "I am someone who does not drink" can completely transform your sobriety. If you’ve ever felt like you’re still chained to your past, even after getting sober, this episode is for you. It’s time to rethink the way we define ourselves—and step fully into the life we deserve. 🎧 Tune in now and let’s talk about making a real, lasting shift in your recovery.
Fri, February 14, 2025
Ever feel like you're white-knuckling your way through sobriety? In this powerful episode, we explore how mindfulness can transform your recovery journey from a daily struggle into a sustainable path forward. You'll discover why fighting cravings often backfires, how mindfulness actually rewires your brain to support recovery, and practical techniques you can start using today - even if meditation isn't your thing. Whether you're newly sober or years into recovery, this episode offers science-backed strategies and real-life stories that show how mindfulness can help you move beyond just staying sober to building a life worth staying sober for. Plus, learn the simple 3-minute practice that's helping people in recovery find peace, manage triggers, and actually enjoy their sober lives. Don't miss this game-changing conversation about one of recovery's most powerful tools.
Fri, February 07, 2025
Addiction destroys our self-trust, making us believe we’re weak, incapable, and unable to handle life without substances. And even after we quit, those thoughts don’t just disappear. In this episode, we’re breaking down how addiction wrecks confidence, why waiting to ‘feel ready’ is a trap, and the real way to rebuild self-trust in recovery. Plus, we’ll talk about the dangers of trying to force confidence too soon—and how to do it the right way. If you’ve ever doubted yourself in sobriety, this episode is for you.
Fri, January 31, 2025
Relapse can feel like the ultimate failure—but it’s not. What matters most isn’t that you slipped, but what you do next. In this episode, we’re taking a deep dive into what led up to the relapse, rather than just focusing on the final moment of picking up a drink. We’ll break down the warning signs, talk about how to shift back into sobriety without falling into a long relapse cycle, and discuss how to have those tough conversations with family and friends. If you’ve relapsed or fear you might, this episode is for you. Let’s turn this setback into a learning experience—one that helps you move forward stronger than before.
Fri, January 24, 2025
Do you really need to hit “rock bottom” to get sober? This week, we’re breaking down one of the biggest myths in recovery—the idea that you have to lose everything before you can make a change. I’ll share my own story, explain why waiting for rock bottom is dangerous, and discuss how finding your “why” is far more important than reaching some catastrophic low. If you’ve ever questioned whether your struggles are “bad enough” to quit, this episode is for you.
Fri, January 17, 2025
In this episode of The Sober and Happy Podcast , we’re tackling the fear, challenges, and liberation tied to the decision to stop being anonymous in recovery. For years, I hid my story, worried about judgment, rejection, and missed opportunities. But living in secrecy only fueled shame and kept me stuck. Today, I’m sharing why I chose to stop hiding, how it transformed my relationships and self-worth, and the powerful impact it’s had on others. Whether you’re considering opening up about your recovery or simply looking for inspiration, this episode is for you. 🎧 Listen now to discover how embracing your story can set you free.
Fri, January 10, 2025
Burnout can sneak into our lives, especially in recovery, where we’re navigating so much change and growth. In this episode, we break down what burnout really is, how it differs from everyday stress, and why it can be so dangerous for our sobriety. We’ll explore how overcommitting, ignoring warning signs, and neglecting self-care can set us up for exhaustion and even relapse. Most importantly, we’ll share practical ways to recover from burnout, prevent it in the future, and keep your sobriety strong. Whether you’re feeling overwhelmed or want to build resilience, this episode is packed with insights to help you thrive.
Fri, January 03, 2025
In this New Year’s episode of The Sober and Happy Podcast, we’re diving into the popular trend of Dry January. Is it a step toward meaningful change or just a temporary break? Join me as we explore the pros, the pitfalls, and how to make the most of this 31-day alcohol-free challenge. We will discuss practical tips for evaluating your relationship with alcohol, challenging limiting beliefs, and building a foundation for lasting change. Whether you’re participating in Dry January or simply rethinking your habits, this episode is packed with insights to help you reflect and grow. Ready to make this month count? Tune in for the latest episode!
Fri, December 27, 2024
As 2024 comes to a close, many of us are focused on setting resolutions for the new year. But how often do we pause to reflect on the lessons from the past year—both the wins and the challenges? In this episode, I’m sharing the top 5 lessons I’ve learned in 2024 that have shaped my journey in sobriety, personal growth, and authenticity. From overcoming burnout to embracing your authentic self, we’ll explore how reflecting on these lessons can guide us to a more intentional and fulfilling 2025. 🎙️ Tune in to learn how to reflect, reset, and set the foundation for a better year ahead.
Fri, December 20, 2024
Triggers are a normal part of recovery, but they don’t have to control you. In this episode of the Sober and Happy Podcast , we explore what triggers are, why avoiding them isn’t always the answer, and how to navigate them with confidence. Learn practical tools to identify triggers, create strategies, and build resilience to face them head-on. Whether you’re new to recovery or further along, this episode will help you turn triggers into opportunities for growth.
Fri, December 13, 2024
In this episode of the Sober and Happy Podcast , we explore a powerful mindset shift that can transform your sobriety journey: focusing on how today’s choices impact “Tomorrow You.” Inspired by the lyrics of Luke Combs’ song Tomorrow Me , we discuss how pausing to consider tomorrow’s version of yourself can guide better decisions, reduce regret, and strengthen your commitment to a sober, fulfilling life. We’ll dive into practical strategies to honor “Tomorrow You,” like pausing before acting, visualizing outcomes, writing letters to your future self, and creating reminders to stay connected to your goals. These simple yet effective tools can help you break free from impulsive habits and build a life that aligns with your true intentions. Whether you’re early in recovery or years into your sober journey, this episode is packed with insights and actionable advice to help you make decisions today that lead to a brighter, prouder tomorrow. 🎧 Tune in now and take the first step toward honoring the person you’re becoming!
Fri, December 06, 2024
Have you ever told yourself, “I’ll quit tomorrow”? You’re not alone. For so many of us, “tomorrow” becomes the default excuse, keeping us stuck in harmful patterns. But what happens when tomorrow never comes? In this episode of the Sober and Happy Podcast , we’re diving deep into the dangers of delaying change and the mindset traps that keep us from taking action. We’ll explore why we wait, how fear fuels procrastination, and the toll it takes on our lives. More importantly, we’ll share practical steps to help you stop putting off sobriety and start embracing the change you deserve—today. If you’ve ever struggled with the “one more day” mentality, this episode is for you. Break free from the cycle of delay and take your first step toward a better, sober life. 🎧 Tune in now and let’s make today the day for change.
Fri, November 29, 2024
The journey to sobriety is filled with challenges that can feel overwhelming, but every obstacle has a solution. In this episode, we examine the top barriers people face when deciding to get sober and offer practical strategies for overcoming them. From the fear of withdrawal and losing relationships to worries about boredom, social life, and even the courage to make meaningful changes, we break it down with relatable stories, actionable tips, and fresh perspectives. Whether you’re just starting your journey or supporting someone on theirs, this episode is packed with insights to help you navigate the road to recovery with confidence and hope. Tune in and discover how to face these challenges head-on and create a fulfilling life free from addiction.
Fri, November 22, 2024
The holiday season can be one of the most joyful—and challenging—times for those in recovery. With traditions often centered around alcohol and social pressures at their peak, navigating this time sober can feel overwhelming, especially if it's your first sober holiday. In this episode, we’ll explore practical strategies for staying grounded, setting boundaries, and handling the unexpected. From creating a holiday sobriety plan to building new traditions and staying connected to your "why," you'll walk away with tools to not only survive the holidays but also enjoy them in a way that aligns with your recovery. Whether you're preparing for family gatherings, workplace parties, or quiet nights at home, this guide will help you protect your sobriety while finding joy in the season. Tune in to make this holiday season your most fulfilling one yet—without compromising your recovery. 🎄✨
Fri, November 15, 2024
In this episode, we’re diving into the red flags that often get ignored—both during active addiction and in recovery. These warning signs can range from small, seemingly harmless behaviors to major indicators that things might be heading in the wrong direction. We'll discuss how to recognize these red flags, why we tend to rationalize or minimize them, and how to take action before they escalate. Whether you’re questioning your drinking, navigating early sobriety, or well into recovery, this episode will help you stay mindful and committed to building a better life. Don’t miss this important conversation!
Fri, November 08, 2024
In the early days of sobriety, the challenges can feel so overwhelming that many of us give up. In this episode, we break down what to expect in those early stages, from physical symptoms to emotional hurdles, and offer practical steps to help you navigate each day successfully. You’ll hear strategies for managing cravings, facing social pressures, and creating new routines to keep you motivated. Whether you’re just starting out or need a reminder of why you took this path, this episode offers the guidance you need to stay the course and embrace a sober and happy life. Looking for support on your sober journey? Check out our private Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soberandhappy .
Fri, November 01, 2024
In this episode, we dive deep into the powerful connection between sobriety and mental health. Many people turn to alcohol as a way to cope with stress, anxiety, or depression, but what if drinking only makes these issues worse over time? Join us as we explore how alcohol impacts brain chemistry, amplifies mental health challenges, and creates dependency. We’ll also discuss how sobriety opens the door to mental clarity, emotional healing, and genuine self-discovery. Learn practical steps to manage mental health without alcohol and how you can start rewiring your brain to thrive in sobriety. Tune in to discover how living sober can help you not only find stability but also build a foundation for lasting happiness and mental well-being.
Fri, October 25, 2024
Who are you without alcohol? In this episode, we explore the journey of rediscovering your true identity in sobriety. From uncovering hidden passions and reconnecting with your authentic self to navigating the challenges of breaking free from old labels, this episode dives deep into the process of rebuilding a fulfilling life beyond addiction. Whether you're newly sober or have been on this path for a while, tune in for practical steps, inspiring insights, and real talk on creating a joyful, purpose-driven life without alcohol.
Fri, October 18, 2024
Participating in the Sober October challenge? In this episode, we dive into how to get the most out of a month without alcohol, celebrate your decision to start, and discuss the potential pitfalls of short-term sobriety challenges. Learn why Sober October can be a great stepping stone for long-term change and how to avoid setting yourself up for relapse. We'll also cover key strategies to evaluate your drinking habits, set meaningful goals, and explore whether quitting alcohol for good could transform your life. Tune in for practical tips, inspiring stories, and a path toward lasting sobriety.
Fri, October 11, 2024
In this episode, we explore the powerful process of reframing your thoughts to overcome addiction. Many people hold limiting beliefs like “I can only have fun when I’m drinking” or “This substance is what connects me to others,” but these beliefs are keeping you stuck. We’ll dive into how to challenge and change those thought patterns, giving you the tools to find freedom and create a healthier, happier life in recovery. Tune in and start shifting your mindset today!
Fri, October 04, 2024
In this episode, we tackle an all-too-common challenge in recovery—feeling stuck in a rut. Sobriety can sometimes feel stagnant, leaving us wondering how to reignite the momentum we once had. We explore why this happens, how to recognize the signs of being stuck, and practical steps you can take to break free. Tune in to learn how to overcome the feeling of stagnation and start moving forward again on your journey to a sober and happy life.
Fri, September 27, 2024
In this episode, we dive into the often-overlooked transition from an addictive mindset to a sober mindset. When addiction runs our lives, everything feels chaotic, fast-paced, and full of highs and lows. But when we step into sobriety, that chaos is replaced by stillness, and it can feel like something’s missing. We explore why this shift can feel uncomfortable at first, how to fill the void left by addiction with positive pursuits, and why the peace found in sobriety is worth the journey. Tune in to learn how to appreciate the calm and create a fulfilling, exciting sober life
Fri, September 20, 2024
In this Sober and Happy podcast episode, we dive into worrying less and living more in our recovery journey. Worry can be a major obstacle to achieving long-term sobriety, often robbing us of peace, energy, and progress. We'll discuss how to recognize worry, the negative impact it has on our mindset and recovery, and practical strategies for letting go of unnecessary fears. Learn how to shift your focus from anxiety to action and embrace a life of freedom and fulfillment in sobriety. Don’t let worry hold you back from the life you deserve! Tune in for actionable insights and a weekly challenge to help you worry less and live more.
Fri, September 13, 2024
In this episode, we tackle a topic that can feel discouraging when you first get sober: the statistics. While it’s true that the odds of long-term sobriety can seem stacked against us, these numbers don’t define your personal journey or success. Join me as I break down why people struggle with staying sober, the mindsets that set us up for failure, and—most importantly—how you can shift your perspective to beat the odds. From reframing the way we look at failure to adopting a growth mindset, this episode is all about empowerment and taking control of your recovery. Tune in to hear how you can stop focusing on past statistics and start focusing on your present potential. Link to the speech mentioned in the podcast: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BElkCNmtEvI
Fri, September 06, 2024
In this episode, I want to tackle one of the biggest questions in recovery: Why do people relapse? If you google it, you will get various lists of the top ten reasons people relapse. If you have read any recovery literature, you might have seen the acronym HALT, which says we are more vulnerable to relapse when we are hungry, angry, lonely, or tired. But what if I told you that when we take a step back and look at relapse, there really is only one reason that we relapse? So what is that reason, and what steps can we take to avoid it? Well, that is what we are going to be talking about in this episode.
Fri, August 30, 2024
In this episode of the Sober and Happy podcast, we dive into the topic of self-sabotage. We explore how self-sabotage can jeopardize your recovery, how to recognize the warning signs before it’s too late, and actionable steps you can take to stop it in its tracks. By understanding the patterns of self-sabotage and learning how to break free from them, you can stay on the path to a fulfilling and empowered sober life. Tune in to discover how to overcome this hurdle and keep moving forward on your journey.
Fri, August 23, 2024
In this episode, we explore the concept of taking ownership of your life, especially when it feels like the world is against you. Through a powerful story of resilience, we discuss how to confront and overcome the excuses that keep you stuck, emphasizing the importance of consistency in recovery. We also delve into what it means to live boldly and authentically, encouraging you to take that leap of faith into a future filled with possibility. This episode is a call to reclaim your life, embrace your true self, and stop waiting for the perfect moment to change.
Fri, August 16, 2024
Gratitude is a concept that gets tossed around a lot, especially in self-development and recovery communities. But today, we’re going to explore how it plays a crucial role in sobriety. We’ll explore how gratitude can be a foundation for sobriety, how it can shift our mindset, build resilience, act as a coping mechanism, and the importance of a daily gratitude practice. But it’s not all sunshine—we’ll also touch on the potential dangers of overusing gratitude and the importance of balancing it with authentic emotional processing. Tune in to learn how gratitude can help you build a fulfilling, sober, and happy life.
Fri, August 09, 2024
In this episode, we dive into a transformative topic: finding purpose and passion in sobriety. For many of us, alcohol or drugs were used to fill a void, leaving us feeling lost when we remove them from our lives. But what if sobriety isn’t just about giving something up? What if it’s about discovering something new and meaningful? Join me as I share personal stories and insights on how to reconnect with old passions and explore new ones, creating a life that excites and motivates you. We’ll discuss the power of rediscovery, the joy of trying new things, and how finding purpose can turn sobriety from a necessity into a true joy. This episode is about more than just staying sober; it’s about living a life that makes sobriety something to celebrate. If you’ve ever wondered how to find direction and meaning in your recovery journey, this is the episode for you.
Fri, August 02, 2024
Today, we're discussing a crucial topic for anyone considering sobriety: when is the right time to get sober? Spoiler alert: the right time is now. We'll explore why we shouldn't wait any longer, the consequences of putting it off, combatting the excuses not to get sober today, and all the reasons to take the plunge immediately.
Thu, July 25, 2024
In this episode, we tackle the controversial belief that alcoholics and addicts are powerless over their addiction. While this notion is a cornerstone of many traditional recovery programs, it can sometimes lead to feelings of helplessness and limit personal growth. Join us as we explore the origins of this belief, its potential pitfalls, and more empowering alternatives. Learn how to reclaim your power, build self-confidence, and adopt a growth mindset on your journey to a fulfilling, sober life. Tune in and discover how you can transform your recovery journey from a passive struggle to an active, empowering experience!
Fri, July 19, 2024
Today, we’re diving into the importance of taking regular inventories of our sobriety journey. Regular self-reflection is a powerful tool for maintaining balance and fostering growth. Why are regular inventories crucial? How do we conduct them effectively? And what benefits can we expect from making them a routine part of our lives? Join us as we unpack these questions and more, helping you stay proactive and balanced in your recovery. This episode is a must-listen for anyone looking to strengthen their sobriety and overall well-being.
Fri, July 12, 2024
This episode delves into the importance of achieving balance in our lives, especially during recovery. We often hear about balance in the recovery and self-development communities, but how many achieve it? We'll explore whether balance is truly achievable, the dangers of imbalance, and practical steps to achieve more balance. Tune in to learn how to create a fulfilling, balanced life that supports long-term sobriety and happiness. Buckle up; this is going to be a great episode!
Fri, July 05, 2024
Summer has arrived, bringing with it outdoor activities, vacations, and social events—along with unique challenges for those of us on the sobriety journey. How do we navigate summer while staying true to our commitment to sobriety? In this episode, I’ll share practical tips for navigating summer social events, planning ahead to avoid temptation, and discovering new sober activities to make this season enjoyable. Click play, and let’s get started!
Fri, June 28, 2024
In this episode of the "Sober and Happy Podcast," we confront a harsh truth: we live in a society filled with alcohol. Complaining about it won't change anything, so our only choice is to learn how to navigate this reality while enjoying a fulfilling, sober life. But how do we socialize sober and deal with situations where alcohol is present? Today, we'll share practical tips and personal stories to help you build the muscles needed to enjoy socializing without drinking. From planning ahead to redefining what fun means, this episode is packed with valuable insights to support your journey from simply being sober to living a happy, vibrant life. Click play to discover how you can confidently navigate social situations, build deeper connections, and have fun without alcohol.
Fri, June 21, 2024
In this episode, we tackle the vital topic of learning from your mistakes to avoid repeating them. Mistakes are inevitable in recovery, but how we respond to them can make all the difference. We'll discuss why taking responsibility, forgiving ourselves, and adopting a growth mindset is crucial. I'll share personal stories and practical tips on turning mistakes into valuable learning experiences that strengthen our sobriety. Click play to learn how to transform setbacks into stepping stones towards a sober and happy life.
Fri, June 14, 2024
In this episode, we tackle a crucial topic for anyone in recovery: the top energy wasters that can derail our journey to sobriety. We'll explore how to identify and eliminate these energy drainers to maintain focus and motivation. Here’s what we’ll cover: The importance of avoiding energy-wasting habits and behaviors. Why self-care, positive self-talk, and healthy relationships are essential for sustained sobriety. Practical tips for conserving and redirecting your energy towards positive, productive activities. Click play to discover how you can manage your energy better and stay on track in your recovery journey.
Fri, June 07, 2024
When we first get sober, many of us are driven by the pain and consequences of our drinking. It’s a powerful motivator. We remember the hangovers, the broken relationships, the lost jobs, and the overall chaos that drinking brought into our lives. This pain is so strong that it is often the best motivation to quit. But why does this motivation not last for so many of us? Why doesn’t the fear of going back to that pain keep people sober? And most importantly, what can we do to stay motivated in our recovery journeys? In this episode of The Sober and Happy Podcast, we will discuss the things we can do today to build sustainable motivation.
Thu, May 30, 2024
Anybody who has quit drinking can tell you that you don’t just quit drinking and automatically stop thinking about alcohol. I am certain that I noticed beer commercials and billboards even more once I stopped drinking. I definitely started noticing every single time I walked past the liquor aisle in the grocery store. So, how do we stop obsessing about alcohol once we stop drinking? Do we ever get to the point where we can simply live our lives alcohol-free and no longer always worry about how to stay sober? In this episode, we will discuss the positive impact that shifting our focus from alcohol to living can have on our recoveries and our lives.
Fri, May 24, 2024
Like nature, our recovery journeys have seasons—each with unique challenges and rewards. In this episode, we discuss how to navigate each season effectively, how to prepare for the inevitable challenges, and how to appreciate the unique opportunities each season offers. Just like in nature, no season lasts forever, and understanding this can help us find balance and resilience in our recovery journey. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by the ups and downs of sobriety, or if you’re struggling to find your footing in a challenging time, this episode is for you.
Fri, May 17, 2024
In this episode, we explore a question that many people ask: What does it mean to be truly sober and happy? This isn’t about living in a constant state of bliss; life will always have its ups and downs. Instead, it's about building a genuinely fulfilling and joyful life, so much so that the idea of drinking becomes obsolete. If you’ve ever felt unfulfilled in your sobriety or wondered how to find lasting joy, this episode is for you. We’ll discuss practical steps to build a life that supports your sobriety and makes it genuinely rewarding. Click play now to join us on this journey towards a life where sobriety and happiness go hand in hand.
Fri, May 10, 2024
In this episode, we talk about the misconception that might feel all too real if you're new to sobriety: the belief that everyone drinks. In my journey into sobriety, I discovered that a surprisingly large portion of the population chooses not to drink. Not because they can't but because they choose not to. Did you know that 38% of Americans don't drink at all? Or that the most common reason people choose not to drink is simply having no desire to? We'll explore how these revelations can change how you view social interactions and help you feel less isolated in your sober journey. So, if you've ever felt like an outcast for not drinking, or if you're curious about navigating a seemingly alcohol-centric world sober, this is the episode for you. Click play now to discover a different perspective on sobriety and learn how to thrive in a world where you don't have to drink to fit in.
Fri, May 03, 2024
In today’s episode of the "Sober and Happy Podcast," we tackle a critical aspect of recovery: rebuilding trust. If you've ever felt frustrated because people in your life still view you through the lens of your past behaviors despite your progress in sobriety, this episode is for you. I've been where you are—knowing deep down that I've changed, yet facing doubts from those around me. We'll explore how long it really takes to rebuild trust and effective strategies to accelerate this process. This episode is packed with relatable stories and actionable advice, from personal anecdotes, like moving out of my mom's house to demonstrate maturity, to the lessons learned from a candid conversation between two young brothers about honesty. We'll discuss the importance of consistency in our actions, the impact of small lies on our credibility, and practical ways to deal with accusations or doubts from loved ones. Whether it’s utilizing compassionate communication or understanding the necessity of patience, I’ll guide you through the steps to not only regain trust but also strengthen your relationships. So, if you're struggling with the slow pace of gaining trust or if you feel like no matter what you do, it's never enough—tune in. This episode will provide you with the tools and mindset to navigate these challenges and continue on your path to a sober and happy life. Click play now to discover how to transform your relationships and ensure that your actions speak louder than your past.
Fri, April 26, 2024
Recovery is going to be filled with a series of ups and downs. There is nothing that we can do to prevent setbacks completely. We are going to make mistakes. Life is absolutely going to knock us down at times. There are times when we will think that we can’t go on. But we can. We have the choice whether to give up or to get up, dust ourselves off, and take a step forward, no matter how small that step may be. So how do we do that? How can we move forward when it seems so difficult? That is what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, April 19, 2024
One of the most dangerous but often overlooked places to be in our recovery journeys is when we are stuck in a rut. Suddenly, things that might have excited us about being sober and life start to feel boring or dull. When this starts happening, it often triggers many of the negative emotions that we experienced when we were still drinking or using, as anxiety and depression start coming back. If left untreated, thoughts like “If I am going to feel this way sober, I might as well get drunk” might start creeping into our heads. So, how do we get out of these ruts and recognize them before they get too deep? That is what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, April 12, 2024
Deciding to quit any substance is hard enough, but we often unknowingly do things that can make things more difficult for us. One of those things is not doing any preparation to get sober. We have one of those “I will never drink again” mornings, decide to quit, pick a date, and then try to white-knuckle it. But what steps can we take before taking the last drink that can increase our chances of having success? That is what we are going to talk about in this episode. Topics mentioned in this episode can be further explored in the following episodes: #2: Finding Your Why For Getting and Staying Sober #10: So You Relapsed, Now What? #15: Do I Need To Give Up My Old Friends And Life When I Get Sober? #19: How To Set and Maintain Boundaries When We Get Sober #21: Getting Honest About Your Alcoholism #51: How To Deal With Triggers After You Get Sober Also, if you are looking for support during your recovery journey, check out the Sober and Happy Community here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soberandhappy
Fri, April 05, 2024
A couple of weeks ago, I posted the following question on my social media pages: What signs might indicate a relapse was near? I got hundreds of responses, and after going through each one, I compiled a list of the top 7 relapse warning signs according to you guys. Recognizing them is the first step, but what should we do once we recognize them, and how can we be proactive in not slipping back into them again? That is what we are going to discuss in this episode. If you recognize yourself in any of these warning signs and want to take steps to prevent relapsing, you might find these episodes helpful: #10: So You Relapsed, Now What? #15: Do I Need To Give Up My Old Friends And Life When I Get Sober? #22: Why You Must Get To The Cause Of Your Addiction If You Want To Recover #23: The Process I Used To Completely Remove My Alcohol Cravings #44: Dealing With The Fear Of Missing Out (FOMO) In Your Sobriety #48: What Are You Willing To Sacrifice For Your Sobriety? #51: How To Deal With Triggers After You Get Sober #57: Establishing and Maintaining Healthy Sober Routines Also, if you are looking for support, please join our private Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soberandhappy
Fri, March 29, 2024
I want to talk about one of the most elusive things in the universe. Something we have searched long and hard for, but have never had concrete evidence that it exists. I am not talking about Big Foot, the Loch Ness monster, or UFOs. I am talking about discovering an alcoholic who has found a way to control their drinking and finally be able to drink like a normal person. At some point, most of us have wondered if we could crack the code and learn how to drink like a normal person. But is it possible? Is there a way? That is what we are going to be talking about in this episode.
Fri, March 22, 2024
Our addiction and recovery journeys are not a straight path. They are journeys filled with twists, turns, ups, and downs. It is easy to slip into the habit of embracing the journey when everything is going well, but then instantly question whether it is worth it when something bad happens. But what if we are where we are supposed to be even when things appear to be going wrong? What if the lessons we learn through our challenges are what make us strong enough to conquer our addictions finally? What if the secret to long-term sobriety is learning to embrace our journey no matter where we are at this exact moment? That is what we are going to be talking about in this episode.
Fri, March 15, 2024
I think one of the biggest obstacles many of us have when we are considering a sober life, is worrying about how we are going to function without alcohol. To an outsider, this may seem crazy. It may seem obvious that alcohol is the cause of all the problems in our lives, but for many of us, it also is the solution to many of the problems in our lives. So what do we do when alcohol seems to be both the problem and the solution? Are things going to get worse once we quit? How are we going to handle so many of the things we turned to alcohol for? That is what we are going to be talking about in this episode.
Fri, March 08, 2024
If you have been in the recovery world for any amount of time, you have likely heard the term “dry drunk”. This term is thrown around often, but I don’t think it is fully understood. I know I didn’t understand it when I first got sober, I just knew from the way everybody talked about it, that I should try not to become one. But, what does it mean to be a "dry drunk"? How do we recognize the behaviors of it and how does that affect our recovery? That is what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, March 01, 2024
Let me know if you have ever caught yourself justifying a bad habit with the following statement “Yeah, but at least I am not drinking, right?” Don’t feel bad if you have. Early in sobriety, I said that so much I might as well have had a t-shirt and bumper sticker made with that phrase on it. And there is truth to that statement. Many of the other habits that I was clinging to did not have the level of consequences that my drinking did. But they all still had consequences. So how do we discover other habits and behaviors we should take a second look at? Can these other habits jeopardize our recovery, and if so, how do we recognize that? That is what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, February 23, 2024
I want you to ask yourself the following question. Is your sobriety and life being guided by the opinions of others? I know many of us in recovery identify as people pleasers and we often find ourselves saying yes to things even though we may not want to do them. Doing this can often cause us to stay in a place in our lives that does not serve us simply because we are worried about disappointing others. So how do we begin to make decisions that are not only best for us, but also for the people closest to us? How can we learn to start saying no? That is what we are going to be talking about in this episode.
Fri, February 16, 2024
Let me know if this sounds familiar. You are sick and tired of something and you know you have to make a change. Maybe it is getting sober, maybe it is another big change in your life, or maybe it is finally chasing that dream you have always had. You tell yourself, I am going to start Monday and you mean it. This time it is going to be different. Then as Monday gets closer, all the reasons we know we must change start to get drowned out by all the reasons we are finding why we should put it off. Then Monday rolls around, and nothing changes. So how do we push through that blockage? How do we stay motivated when the initial conviction to change starts to get drowned out by our justifications to put it off until next Monday? Well, that is what we are going to be talking about in this episode.
Fri, February 09, 2024
It's natural to seek guidance from those who have walked a similar path before us. After all, who better to understand our struggles than someone who has been there themselves? Many of us do not know how to stay sober, so we often find ourselves blindly following advice given to us in recovery which can lead us down a dangerous path. It can cause us to ignore our own instincts and intuition, ultimately hindering our progress in recovery. We may find ourselves trying to fit into someone else's mold rather than embracing our own journey. But what happens when the advice we receive isn't necessarily what's best for us? How do we know which advice we should be following and when we should consider alternative advice from someone else? How can we discover our own path to sobriety rather than living one that is laid out for us? That is what we are going to discuss in this episode.
Fri, February 02, 2024
I have a lot of people who reach out to me asking what the secret to lasting sobriety is. While I don’t think there is one secret, I can look back on my own experience and identify some of the most pivotal moments in my sobriety. Always at the top of that list are moments when I was open to forgiveness. Forgiveness to myself, forgiveness to others, and being open to asking for forgiveness from someone that I had hurt in the past. With each of those moments, I felt like I leveled up in my sobriety as I felt huge weights I had been carrying for so long were finally lifted from me. So how do we begin the process of forgiveness? How can we finally be willing to let go of some of the things that we have held onto for so long? That is what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, January 26, 2024
A very common piece of advice to newly sober people is to remove the things in your life that are associated with drinking. I don't know about you, but in my life when I was drinking, everything I did was associated with drinking. I followed the advice and it left a huge void in my life. What we do to replace that void is often the difference between struggling with staying sober and living a sober and happy life. In this episode, we will talk about how to know what things we need to remove from our lives, the types of things we can fill that void with, and why it is so important to fill our lives with reasons not to drink.
Fri, January 19, 2024
Often when I talk to people in recovery they will ask me how often I get judged since I decided to start being open about my past addiction and my current recovery. I only started posting on social media this last year, but I stopped hiding the fact that I don’t drink because of my past drinking problems about 7 years ago around the time I decided to stop going to Alcoholics Anonymous. Do I get nasty messages in my inbox? Do friends, coworkers, or random people I went to high school with look at me differently? Do I get passed up on promotions at work because my coworkers and leaders at my company know? That is what we talk about in this episode.
Fri, January 12, 2024
One of the patterns I have seen often from people struggling in recovery is after the initial emotional boost from escaping from addiction, there comes a point in many people's recovery where they fall into a lull where life seems just to be dull. And then the thought creeps into their head, where they start thinking “Is this really it?”. Most of these people are simply not drinking and have settled into a routine that does not match the life they are capable of living. A life filled with joy, excitement, and fulfillment. They simply have settled for just being sober. So how do we recognize this stage, what are the reasons we tend to gravitate towards settling, and what can we do to get out of that rut? That is what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, January 05, 2024
First off, Happy New Year! The start of every year encourages promise and hope for the next year, which often means making changes. One thing that has gained popularity over the years is dry January. If you are not familiar with the movement, it is when someone commits to not drinking for the entire month of January. I have known many people who have taken on this challenge, but is it a good idea? Well, that depends. In this episode, we will discuss who should and shouldn’t consider the challenge and how to get the most out of it if you decide to do it.
Fri, December 29, 2023
As the year comes to a close, I always spend time in reflection. I not only look at my last year, but I often reflect on years past and see where I am improving and what areas in my life could use some changes. In doing this, I thought of many of the mistakes I have made along my sobriety journey and what I would have done differently if I could go back and give myself advice. I thought today would be a good day to do something a little different and talk about those things.
Fri, December 22, 2023
I often repeat the phrase, “What you say matters” and that couldn’t be more true when it comes to what we say about ourselves. You see, our beliefs about ourselves shape our reality. But often, especially when battling addiction, we carry limiting beliefs that can hold us back from achieving a life of sobriety and happiness. So, how do we begin to recognize what beliefs are holding us back and how do we change the narrative of what we say to ourselves so that they push us forward instead of holding us back? That is what we are going to discuss in this episode.
Fri, December 15, 2023
When we get sober, we face a lot of challenges. Most of the focus in the recovery world is on the things we need to avoid in our environment, such as dealing with being around alcohol. However, having had past failures in the years before finally staying sober, along with working with many people over the years, I have found that the biggest dangers for a relapse lurk within us. What things should we be looking out for that may be leading us down a dangerous path? That is what we are going to discuss in this episode.
Fri, December 08, 2023
One of the biggest challenges I faced in early sobriety was dealing with the fact that I was surrounded by alcohol. Even though I stopped going to bars and did not have alcohol in my house, it was everywhere. Billboards, TV commercials, and the grocery store. It seemed like everywhere I turned, I was reminded of the substance I was desperately trying to quit. So how do we stay sober in a society that has normalized a substance that has ruined so many of our lives? That is what we are going to discuss in this episode.
Fri, December 01, 2023
One of the biggest obstacles many of us have on our recovery journey is dealing with guilt and shame. Whether it's the harm caused to ourselves or others, the lies told, the promises broken, or having to say no to doing things with our old friends because it might jeopardize our recovery, guilt and shame have a way of stalling our progress in recovery and many times lead to relapse. So how do we begin to deal with these strong and sometimes crippling emotions and begin the process of forgiving ourselves? Well, that is what we are going to discuss in this episode.
Fri, November 24, 2023
The holiday season is officially among us, and I know this time of year causes a lot of anxiety for people in recovery, especially if it is your first. So how can we navigate the holiday season so that we not only stay sober but enjoy the holiday season sober? In this episode, I will talk about some of the challenges I faced during my first sober holiday season. I will give you practical tips you can apply right now to help you have a sober and happy holiday season. Also, I will be launching the Sober and Happy merchandise line this weekend. If you want to see what I have created for you guys, check out the store at www.soberandhappy/merch . I appreciate your support.
Fri, November 17, 2023
The question I get asked the most from people about my recovery is “What is the most important thing you have done to stay sober for so many years?”. The answer is easy for me. It is because I have established and maintained a healthy routine. Over the years, I have replaced bad habits that set me back with healthy ones. So where do we even start when it comes to establishing healthy routines? Can we change too many things at once? And if so, what should we be prioritizing? Well, that is what we are going to discuss in this episode.
Fri, November 10, 2023
If you are in the recovery world long enough, you can start to pick up on patterns that are common between the people who are more likely to make it and the ones who continue to struggle to stay sober. What I have found, is the most common differences all focus around having what I call a sober mindset. So what is a sober mindset, and how can work towards living in that state of mind?
Fri, November 03, 2023
One of my favorite quotes is something I have heard Tony Robbins say many times which is “Where your focus goes, your energy flows”. You can test this theory quickly anytime you are feeling an emotion strongly. If you are currently angry, what have you focused on most of the day? It is the same reason that if we have a bad day at work, even though we may no longer be working, if we are still thinking about work, we will continue to carry that energy into other parts of our lives. So how do we recognize this and shift our focus onto things that lift our energy rather than bring it down? That is what we will discuss in this episode.
Fri, October 27, 2023
I have lost count of how many times I have seen someone in recovery go through this pattern. They get sober, and things are going really well. They are excited about their recovery, things are starting to turn around for them, they are healing damaged relationships, and it seems like they are going to make it. Then, out of the middle of nowhere, they relapse. But was their relapse actually so sudden and unexpected? Were there warning signs they could have seen if they knew what to look for? Are there things they could have done to avoid the relapse? Well, that is what we are going to discuss in this episode.
Fri, October 20, 2023
We often hear the term functional alcoholic to describe someone who drinks alcoholically but is able to meet the basic requirements in life like maintaining a job and paying their bills. When I first heard this term, I knew that is what I wanted to be. I never wanted to be a normal drinker. The idea of having one or two drinks did not appeal to me. I liked to get drunk. I wanted all the fun without the consequences and I thought that was what being a functional alcoholic would be like. But is that even possible? Can someone be a functional alcoholic? And if so, is there a way to maintain that status, or is it just a phase on the way to being a full-blown alcoholic? Well, that is what we talk about in this episode.
Fri, October 13, 2023
If you listen to most recovery stories there usually is a point that someone will talk about their rock bottom. The point when everything got so bad, that they finally realized they needed to stop. But why do people who have even the worst rock bottoms you can imagine, end up drinking again? Why was the event that motivated them to stop not enough to keep them stopped? Well that is what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, October 06, 2023
Addiction can be a complex and challenging battle especially early in sobriety. In those early months of my recovery, it seemed like everything triggered me, and on many days I would have multiple triggers that would accumulate throughout the day and I was not sure if I was going to make it through the day. Let me know if something like this has happened to you. Everything is going great. You have put together some days, weeks, or even months of sobriety. Things are getting a little easier and you are starting to get confidence that you might make it this time. Then out of nowhere, something happens that triggers you. Then the nagging thought of a drink kicks in, and before you know it, another relapse. So how do we navigate our sobriety, when it often seems like triggers are around every corner? Well, that is what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, September 29, 2023
There has been an event that has been gaining traction every year which is Sober October. If you are considering participating in this and taking a month off of drinking, I am going to cover some tips to get the best out of attacking this challenge. If you have been sober for a while, don’t worry, this episode is still for you too as some of the tips are great for evaluating where you are at in your recovery and considering whether you should make any shifts in your recovery.
Fri, September 22, 2023
When I first immersed myself in recovery, I would hear people talk a lot about the importance of emotional sobriety. But when I asked people what it was and how to achieve it, I was surprised by the general lack of understanding of what it actually was. It seemed like one of the terms people tended to repeat, but didn’t have a deep understanding of what it was. So what is emotional sobriety, why is it important, and how do we achieve it? That is what we will talk about in this episode. Books I mentioned in the episode: The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz Rising Strong by Brené Brown The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle Emotional Agility by Susan David The Untethered Soul by Michael Allen Singer Interested in receiving more Sober and Happy content delivered to your email? https://soberandhappy.com/newsletter/ Join the Sober and Happy community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soberandhappy
Fri, September 15, 2023
There is no easy way to say this, but if you want to live a life free of addiction, you are going to have to make some serious sacrifices in your life. You may have to give up many of the habits, environments, and beliefs that led us to and kept us in a life of addiction. So how do we know what things we need to change in our lives to support building our new lives and how do we deal with the challenges associated with making those changes? That is what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, September 08, 2023
In a perfect world, when we decide to start our recovery journey, everyone around us will be understanding and supportive of our journey. Although you will find that many people are, we will often have people who simply are not. Maybe it is the family member who is constantly pointing out your past mistakes, the friend who keeps insisting that “you can have just one”, or co-workers who keep trying to get you to go to happy hour with them after you told them you don’t want to be around alcohol yet. Although we can not control how other people act, there are steps we can take that will help us navigate what to do when we do not feel supported by those closest to us. And that is what this episode is about.
Fri, September 01, 2023
If you have spent any amount of time in recovery, either in meetings of recovery or in recovery groups on the internet, you will see that relapses happen at a staggering rate. It is so common that you will often hear people say that “relapse is a part of recovery” as if it is a certainty that you will relapse at some point. But it doesn’t have to be. In this episode, we will talk about some of the top causes of relapse I have seen, ways we can recognize relapse “red flags”, and the things we can do so that from this point out, we can live a life free of relapse.
Fri, August 25, 2023
You hear it often said that almost everyone has been affected by addiction at some level, and this week has been a big reminder for me. I am attending a podcast conference and have gotten to meet a lot of people in my day here. The conversations at this type of conference usually start with a quick introduction, and then you ask each other what your podcast is about. As I would tell people that I do a podcast on addiction and recovery, person after person has shared with me about how addiction has impacted their life. From the gentleman at the vendor booth who told me that addiction runs rampant throughout his family to the retired police officer to lost his sister to addiction earlier this year. It reminded me of the negative ripples that addiction has far beyond the person addicted, but also showed me the importance of getting sober so that we can start creating positive ripples from our new way of living. In this episode, we will talk about how we can change the current of the ripples we create from negative to positive.
Fri, August 18, 2023
When I first sober everything reminded me of everything I was missing out on. Songs on the radio, posts on social media, and it seemed like every commercial on TV showed people living their best life with a Coors light in their hand. “I am never going to have fun again” is the thought that kept going through my mind. I knew I couldn’t drink again and I had no desire to go back to that old way of life. I simply resigned to the fact that my destiny was going to be a boring, sober, life. But that is not the life I live today. My life has more fun and excitement in it than I ever did drinking. But how did I go from accepting my fate of a boring sober life to a life filled with fun, adventure, and fulfillment? Well, that is what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, August 11, 2023
When we think about addiction and recovery, we often focus on the process of breaking free from substances or destructive behaviors. But what comes after that? Sobriety is not just about abstaining from alcohol or drugs; it's an opportunity to rediscover who we truly are beneath the layers of addiction. Within our addiction, most of us completely lose touch with the person we truly are. And getting clean and sober does not magically return us to our authentic selves and most of us feel even more lost. This is why people who simply quit drinking and stop there end up relapsing. We get so far removed from our true selves that the only person we know is the addicted version, so when things get uncomfortable and we feel lost again, we gravitate toward what we know. But you don’t have to feel lost in your recovery. When we face our addictions and remove alcohol or drugs from our lives, we also have the opportunity to confront the emotions and experiences that we've been trying to avoid and also work to authentically build the character traits we were chasing with our drinking. But how do we do that? That is exactly what we will talk about in this episode. If you are looking for support, join our private Facebook support group which can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soberandhappy More resources and information can be found on my website: https://soberandhappy.com/ Make sure to follow me on both Instagram and Facebook where I post content daily: https://www.instagram.com/iamsoberandhappy/ https://www.facebook.com/IamSoberAndHappy
Fri, August 04, 2023
One of the biggest challenges we have to face when we get sober is cleaning up the mess that many of us have left behind from the damages we have caused by a life of addiction. I have never met a person yet who was getting sober that didn’t have parts of their life that didn’t need rebuilding. For some, it might be rebuilding relationships and trust with the people they love. For others of us, we pretty much burned everything down and are in need of rebuilding from the ground up. This process can be very overwhelming but is one of the most rewarding things you can do in your recovery. In this episode, we talk about how to get started, methods to help us not get too overwhelmed, and how to push through when we hit roadblocks. Please check out our private Facebook support group. You can find it here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soberandhappy
S1 E41 · Fri, July 28, 2023
When I first got sober, it seemed like everything started falling into place. Things were turning around, I was feeling great and was accomplishing so much in life. I definitely was riding what is often referred to as the pink cloud which is that euphoria that you often feel in early sobriety. And I thought that is what sobriety was going to be like forever. And then life happened and brought me crashing back down to reality. So many of the emotions I used alcohol for like depression, anxiety, and loneliness returned. And just like how I thought that amazing feeling of new sobriety was going to last forever, I started thinking that I was going to struggle forever. This is the point where a lot of people start feeling hopeless again and give up. But if you get through those periods you will come out stronger and feeling even better on the other side. In this episode, we will talk about how to not only navigate the ups and downs of recovery but also how to come out of the low points stronger and in a better place on the other side of it.
S1 E40 · Fri, July 21, 2023
Today I want to talk about an important topic that affects so many individuals on their journey to healing - overcoming stigma and shame in our recovery. These are unfortunately common struggles with people in recovery. We worry that people will look at our addictions as a moral failing and that by talking about it we will certainly experience judgment, discrimination, and rejection. Out of fear of this, for many years I kept my past hidden from many people. Like it was a dirty secret I didn’t want anybody to know about. And with each person I chose to hide it from, the stigma and shame only grew. But what happens if we are open and honest about our past? Are people really going to judge us as we fear? Could recovering out loud instead of anonymously, start to remove the stigma and shame around our own recovery and recovery in general? That is what we are going to talk about today.
Fri, July 14, 2023
Most of the time when we look to make improvements in our lives, we look for things we can add. Maybe we upgrade a car, buy that toy we have been thinking about for a while or do something like start traveling more. All those things can be great, however, I find that when it comes to making those big shifts in our life that really make a big difference, subtraction is often what is needed rather than looking for things to add. Today we will talk about how not letting go of things in our lives is almost always what holds us back, how to identify those things, and steps you can take to begin to shed them so that you can step into the life that you desire. We have started a new private Facebook group to provide daily support for all in the Sober and Happy community. You can find that here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soberandhappy I am also posting daily content on both Instagram and Facebook. Make sure to check it out and like my pages: https://www.instagram.com/iamsoberandhappy/ https://www.facebook.com/IamSoberAndHappy
Fri, July 07, 2023
On July 6th, I celebrated 12 years of sobriety. I would have never thought that not only could I go 12 years without drinking, but that I would be in such a happy place in life right now. Every year, I reflect back on the last year of recovery and my entire journey to that point. I do this primarily to reflect on whether I have stayed committed to growing and evolving over the last year, and also to appreciate how far I have come. In this episode, I will share with you the reflections and insights I have had over the last 12 years. We have started a new private Facebook group to provide daily support for all in the Sober and Happy community. You can find that here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soberandhappy I am also posting daily content on both Instagram and Facebook. Make sure to check it out and like my pages: https://www.instagram.com/iamsoberandhappy/ https://www.facebook.com/IamSoberAndHappy
S1 E37 · Fri, June 30, 2023
Throughout my almost 12 years in recovery, I have watched the people who have gone from the lowest of rock bottoms and created amazing lives. I have seen others who have struggled for years, putting together sobriety time here and there, but always ending in a relapse only to try again later. I sadly have also known more people than I can count that have lost the battle of addiction. Although individual circumstances are different, I have seen one common pattern among the people that struggle and the ones that thrive, and that is being intentional and purposeful in their recovery and their lives. So today, I want to discuss the importance of being intentional and discuss ways that you can begin to do that so that you can create a life so amazing, that relapse will be the last thing on your mind. We have started a new private Facebook group to provide daily support for all in the Sober and Happy community. You can find that here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soberandhappy I am also posting daily content on both Instagram and Facebook. Make sure to check it out and like my pages: https://www.instagram.com/iamsoberandhappy/ https://www.facebook.com/IamSoberAndHappy
S1 E36 · Fri, June 23, 2023
When we continually put off taking action, we fall into the trap of believing that opportunities will always be available to us in the future. We convince ourselves that tomorrow will be the perfect time to start, make changes, or pursue our dreams. However, this mindset can lead to missed opportunities and unfulfilled potential. What is that costing us in our recovery? Could this be why the "pink cloud" stage of recovery wears off? Can we regain the same excitement for the sober life we had in the beginning? That is what we talk about in this episode. We have started a new private Facebook group to provide daily support for all in the Sober and Happy community. You can find that here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/soberandhappy I am also posting daily content on both Instagram and Facebook. Make sure to check it out and like my pages: https://www.instagram.com/iamsoberandhappy/ https://www.facebook.com/IamSoberAndHappy
S1 E35 · Fri, June 16, 2023
In this episode, we talk about how the attempt to avoid discomfort is causing most of the struggles not only in recovery but our lives. It is often why we started drinking or using in the first place, a reason why we struggle to be happy in our recovery journey, why it is the core reason behind most relapses, and how our lives will improve dramatically if we challenge and embrace discomfort in our lives.
Fri, June 09, 2023
Within recovery there are several points that we have two choices: give up or be resilient, push through, and become the hero of our own life story. This is very obvious at the decision point of quitting an addiction, but in our recovery journey, we will find ourselves at the crossroads of this decision many times. In this episode, we will discuss why it is vital that we step up to those challenges, why even giving up on what may seem small at the time can begin a pattern that will lead us back to where we started, and how we can step up and be the hero in our own stories, and have great impact to the people around us.
Fri, June 02, 2023
This week, we will talk about how we can build lives that are so amazing that the substance that we were prisoners of for so long, will no longer have any power over us, even if it is all around us. Once we do that, living one day at a time sober no longer will be necessary, because our sobriety simply will just be part of our new amazing lives. We will discuss how to discover the life you want to live and the steps you can take to get there.
Fri, May 26, 2023
If you have been in recovery for any amount of time, you likely have heard some version of the study where they placed a rat in a small enclosure where he had two bottles. One had water, the other was water laced with drugs such as morphine and cocaine and the rat would become hopelessly addicted. However, simultaneously the same scientist performed another experiment that had a shockingly different result, yet it is rarely talked about in the world of addiction recovery. What did he find and why should we be focusing on this less talked about experiment? That is exactly what we are going to talk about in this episode. If you have asked yourself these questions, this episode is for you: Is addiction a disease? Is alcoholism a disease? Is addiction environmental? Why can't I stop drinking?
Fri, May 19, 2023
I wanted to talk about the effects alcoholism and addiction have on our families. I am of the belief that stories are best told by people who have experienced them, so I thought who better to join me on this episode than my mom? She talks about what it was like to watch my destructive path with addiction, and how support from her friends, family, and al-anon helped her cope. She also discusses the fears she carried even after I got sober. Finally, we discuss how those fears eventually turned into hope, and how our lives transformed during that process. This episode shows excellent perspectives from both sides of the journey. I know it was great to record it, I hope you enjoy listening to it.
Fri, May 12, 2023
One of the most common phrases I hear when people are struggling with either active addiction or in their recovery is "I just feel stuck". Sometimes when we feel stuck we don’t know what is holding us back. Other times, we know exactly what it is, but don’t know the best way to get unstuck. In this episode, I am going to discuss how to identify the things that are holding you back and the steps you can take once you have recognized the problem to move forward to where you want to be.
Fri, May 05, 2023
Recovery from any addiction can be incredibly overwhelming to the point that we often will question whether we can make it through those periods where it seems like too much. But when you know the type of things to expect and why those emotions can be so difficult to process helps. Today, we will talk about some of the most common sources of being overwhelmed in recovery and the steps we can take to work through them.
Fri, April 28, 2023
In this episode, I answer some of the most asked questions I have received in the six months of doing this podcast. I talk about the following questions: What to do if I am not being supported by my loved ones when I quit drinking? Is alcoholism a disease? What does your daily routine look like? Should I wait a year after getting sober before dating? Do you ever crave alcohol anymore? Were you worried you were going to relapse when you left AA? How do I stop relapsing?
Fri, April 21, 2023
Today I want to talk about how to live your best life in recovery. I am not talking about the Instagram posts in some exotic location with the tag “living my best life”. I am talking about regularly waking up and being excited about your life even if you aren’t in some exotic location. Waking up in your bed, in your everyday life, and being excited level of your best life. Today, I will give you some tips on how I was able to discover my best life, and how I am able to live it daily. So buckle up, this is going to be a great episode.
Fri, April 14, 2023
I want you to ask yourself this question: Are you happy? If you were to measure the success of your recovery by joy and fulfillment instead of sober days accumulated, would you consider your recovery a success right now? When I started asking people this, they will point to events in their life that made them happy, but if I ask them if they were to think of a day that didn’t have things on the outside going right, would they still feel happy? Surprisingly, the more people I asked this question to in recovery, also had the same realization I did that night after receiving my five-year chip. That I was not happy even though I was staying sober. In today's episode, I want to discuss the steps I took from being lost in a life where I was sober but unfulfilled, and how I have transformed my life into one today that is filled with joy, happiness, and fulfillment.
Fri, April 07, 2023
What is the story that you tell yourself about who you are? Maybe it is that you are not worthy, that you fail at everything you try, that you never will be able to get sober, that sober life is miserable, that you can’t have fun sober, that you are not worthy of love, that you are stuck, that you are a bad friend, child, parent, or sibling. We end up becoming the stories we tell ourselves. Of all the people that I have tried to help, this is the biggest factor in whether they are going to live a happy and fulfilled life without alcohol. So today, I am going to share how I changed my story, how it changed my life, and the steps you can take to start creating your amazing new story.
Fri, March 31, 2023
In today’s episode, I want to discuss the importance of having a plan for getting sober. We will discuss what you should do before taking the last drink, give you steps to get through that first 30 days, and how you can best set yourself up at the beginning of your sobriety to have long-term success.
Fri, March 24, 2023
One of the biggest challenges people have especially in early recovery is dealing with the cravings to return to the substance that has been destroying their lives. I remember when I first got sober, I would hear in AA meetings that some people were still dealing with cravings even decades after getting sober. So how do we deal with the cravings that come in early sobriety and conquer them for good so that this is not a lifetime battle? In today's episode, I am going to tell you how I went from someone who could not go 15 minutes from the moment I woke up without having a drink to not having a single craving for alcohol for several years. If you are asking any of the following questions, this will be a good episode to listen to: How do I stop alcohol cravings? How to manage cravings after quitting drinking? How long do alcohol cravings last? What triggers cravings? Will cravings ever go away?
Fri, March 17, 2023
Today we will discuss one of the biggest reasons I see people still struggle in recovery with either staying sober or being unable to live a sober life filled with joy and happiness. You often see people start their recovery with great enthusiasm. You often hear people refer to this as the “pink cloud”. But for most people, this period of happiness wears off and most people in recovery accept this as simply part of the process. The problem is most people do not survive the post-pink cloud stage. So is it possible to maintain enthusiasm, happiness, and joy years into our recovery journey? If so, how do we do that?
Fri, March 10, 2023
I think most people with addiction problems go through various phases and degrees of denial about the true impact alcohol has on their lives. I know from personal experience getting past denial can be a difficult and often uncomfortable process, but it's an important step toward personal growth and healing. This week, I want to get into the importance of getting real with ourselves and the steps we can take to do an honest evaluation of our true relationship with drinking. If you ask yourself any of the following questions, this episode will be a good listen: Can you be a functional alcoholic? If binge drinking alcoholism? How do I get past my denial of alcoholism?
Fri, March 03, 2023
Today's episode is going to be a little bit different. I had another topic scheduled for this week, but I want to talk about dealing with difficult moments that life deals us when we get sober. This is very fresh for me as someone I love very much had a massive loss in their life this morning. Here is the thing, life can be tough at times. Tragedy doesn’t stop just because we got sober. We just have to learn to deal with it in different and hopefully healthier ways. One of the greatest gifts in sobriety is being able to show up completely for people in our lives and being able to support them when they need it the most. I will talk in this episode about how I navigate life's biggest challenges and how I dealt with my day today.
Fri, February 24, 2023
The inability of people in recovery to establish and set healthy boundaries is one of the biggest struggles I see with people when they are building their new lives. In fact, this is the method I see most people trying to set boundaries which is exactly what I did for the first many years I was sober: If someone does something that upsets us, we react negatively to it with maybe anger, sadness, storming out of the room, passive aggressiveness, or whatever your preferred method is to show you are pissed off. Then we assume they know what they did, why it pissed off us, why they shouldn’t do it anymore, and then we assume that we made ourselves clear. Then the person does it again and we repeat the cycle to only get more and more upset each time. So how do we establish healthy boundaries? How do we communicate them to others? What should we do when people don't respect our boundaries? And how do make sure we are respecting others' boundaries also? Well, that is exactly what we are going to be talking about in this episode.
Fri, February 17, 2023
One of the hardest shifts I see people in recovery make is becoming someone who believes in themselves. It makes perfect sense early in recovery. Most of us while in active addiction have years of making really bad decisions and likely were not someone who can be trusted. So it is natural that when we first get sober, it can be very challenging to trust ourselves and always be questioning our decisions, even the ones that are obviously good decisions. So how do you start learning to trust your intuition again? Well, that is exactly what we are going to talk about in this episode.
Fri, February 10, 2023
Most people don't have a plan for getting sober and simply try to wander through life. They just decide one day today is the day to get sober. They might kind of know where they want to go, but do not have directions on how to get there. They simply wander around hoping that one day they will find a place where they are in a life free of their addiction. Then when things get painful or even slightly uncomfortable they give up because they don't know where they are going. Recovery can be difficult, recovery is overwhelming at times, it is very easy to get off track, and if we don’t have an idea of where we are going and how to get there, it can be very easy to get so lost that the only plan that seems logical at the time, is to simply turn around and go back to where we started. That is how people get stuck in the relapse cycle of recovery. It isn’t from triggers, alcohol being a huge presence in our society, life events, lack of support from family or friends, stress or anxiety, or any of the other reasons we usually blame our relapses on. Those are simply hazards along the way but if you know where you are going and how to get there, they are simply detours and not something that gets us completely lost. When we have a plan though and are focused on our destination, life is more like a navigation app. When we get detoured, it simply reroutes us back to our destination. I want you to become the person that is actively chasing your dreams, checking off boxes of things you want to accomplish, finding ways to overcome your challenges, and growing into the person that is always pushing through those difficult moments of life, knowing that you will come out the other side stronger. Which life sounds better to you? The one where you are struggling to simply just be sober and spending most of your time and energy focusing on everything that is wrong, or the one where you are sober and happy because you are chasing and accomplishing your dreams? So imagine it, name it, write it down, actively plan it, and start moving towards it. You are one decision away from changing your whole life and your destination is not as far as it may seem, so get started today. Starting with this episode. There is a companion form that goes along with this episode to help you create your own roadmap. It can be found here: https://soberandhappy.com/recoveryroadmap/
Fri, February 03, 2023
When you try to change everything at once, you will get overwhelmed, you give up, and nothing ends up changing. So how much should we change at the beginning, and how do we pick and choose what to change?
S1 E15 · Fri, January 27, 2023
In this episode, I want to talk about whether you need to give up your old friends and other things in your life when you get sober. I know many people struggle with giving up the people, places, and things that existed in their old life. One of the most common questions people ask me when they are first sober is whether they can still hang out with their friends that they partied with, can they still go to their old bar to listen to that one band they like, and do they need to give up old friendships or relationships that they had when they were drinking or using. Rather than asking whether we can keep things the same life minus the booze, I think the better question is to ask why would we want to hold onto that old life so desperately. You will find this episode helpful if you have struggled with the following questions: Do I have to give up my friends when I quit drinking? Do I have to change everything when I get sober? Can I still go to the bar after I quit drinking? Can I be around alcohol after I get sober?
S1 E14 · Fri, January 20, 2023
Today we are going to talk about the biggest mystery in recovery that almost all of us alcoholics have tried to solve. I believe people have been trying to solve this riddle since the first time someone figured out how to brew alcohol. And that mystery is: Is it possible to ever be a normal drinker? Have asked yourself any of the following questions: How can I control my drinking? Am I an alcoholic? Why do I always drink so much? Will I always be an alcoholic? Why can't I control how much I drink? Is moderation of alcohol possible? If so, you will find this episode helpful.
S1 E13 · Fri, January 13, 2023
One of the more common questions I see on various recovery forums online is “Can I get sober without AA?” Having spent several years in the beginning of my sobriety in AA and watching the majority of people that come through the doors not stay sober, I have to wonder if we are asking the right question. I have spent many years struggling in AA, many more years researching some of the reasons why so many people struggle in AA, and have experienced massive growth since leaving and applying different methods to my recovery and that is what we are going to talk about today.
S1 E12 · Fri, January 06, 2023
How many times have you heard or even said something like this? Today I lost my job and don’t know how I am going to pay my bills. I am not sure I can get through this without having a drink. When we have that mindset, we set up conditional sobriety on the impossible task of nothing ever going wrong. To live truly sober and happy lives, we must accept and even embrace our challenging times. If you are asking yourself questions like this, then this episode is for you. How can I maintain my sobriety when life is going bad? How do I stay sober after a breakup? How can I quit relapsing every time something goes wrong?
Fri, December 30, 2022
Are you planning on doing a new years resolution? Maybe you are still struggling with your recovery journey and this is the year you want to get and stay sober. Maybe you have put together some sobriety time, yet are not satisfied with some other areas in your life, and want to improve on something else. Maybe you are absolutely killing it right now, and want to keep that momentum so you want to improve even more in an area you are already making progress. Or, maybe you have tried resolutions in the past, failed, have seen everyone around you also fail, and have sworn resolutions off completely. I was in that last camp until I started doing some research and convinced myself to give it another try. If you are considering doing a New Year's resolution this year, this will be a great episode to listen to.
S1 E10 · Fri, December 23, 2022
In this episode, I want to talk about what to do if you just relapsed. Most of the focus around relapse is through relapse prevention methods and with that focus we tend to think all is lost if we did actually relapse. I think the biggest thing you can do for relapse prevention if you have already relapsed is to shift the focus off of the fact that you relapsed to focusing on what you can learn from this so that you can break the patterns that led you to where you are now. We will talk about why you should stop saying things like "relapse is a part of recovery", how to not give up right before you see the rewards of your sobriety, and how you can start putting in place methods to help make this your last sobriety date.
S1 E9 · Fri, December 16, 2022
In this episode, I want to talk about how our identities based on our past is often holding us back from our greatest potential in recovery and life. So much of our identity when we get sober is based on what we think we are not capable of achieving. We start picking up limitations when we are young from people and experiences in life. Maybe we are told we are not smart enough, not talented enough, are a troublemaker, or that we are never going to amount to anything. Then as life goes on we find ways to strengthen that identity and even defend it sometimes to the point that we become addicted to our perceived limitations. We will discuss here how to identify the old identities that our holding us back, how to break the behavior cycle that keeps is there, and how to step into our infinite potential.
S1 E8 · Fri, December 09, 2022
Relapse. The most dreaded word in recovery and the most misunderstood event also. How many times have you talked to people who have relapsed and they can’t really tell you why? They might talk about some general ideas of things that happened leading up to it or maybe they put themselves in a compromising position and were unable to resist when the sudden temptation hit. But is that really why people relapse? In this episode, I want to talk about relapse and how many of the things we have been taught about relapsing and relapse prevention may actually be setting us back on our journey. We will discuss why so many people relapse and don’t know the reasons why, how come some people are able to stay sober without much difficulty and others become chronic relapsers, and why alcohol, drugs, life events, society, the people in your life and your surroundings are not the reason people relapse. You will learn how to understand your recovery better, ways to learn from the speedbumps along the way and be able to create a solid foundation that doesn’t crumble to the point where picking up seems like the only solution.
S1 E7 · Fri, December 02, 2022
In this episode, I share practical tips to navigate a world filled with alcohol after quitting drinking. Although it can be challenging to be surrounded by alcohol, especially in social settings, there are strategies to help. Rather than trying to avoid alcohol entirely, I've learned to accept its presence and focus on what I can control: my reactions and approach to situations involving alcohol. Initially, I used to stress about saying no or explaining my choice to not drink anymore. Seeking advice from others in recovery, I received valuable tips which I share in this episode. By accepting the presence of alcohol, preparing ahead, asserting my choices, building a support network, and prioritizing self-care, I've been able to navigate a world filled with alcohol successfully. Remember, it's about taking control of our own journey and making choices that align with our sobriety. If you have ever asked any of the following questions this would be a good episode to listen to: How can I be around alcohol after I get sober? How to say no when someone offers you a drink? How do I tell people I work with that I don't drink?
S1 E6 · Fri, November 25, 2022
Holidays can be challenging times. When we have drank for so long, so many of the things that we do in life is associated with drinking and that couldn’t be truer for many of us than during the holidays. Everything about the holidays for me revolved around drinking. Partly because many of the people I celebrated with enjoy drinking, and partly because well I am a drunk so I managed to incorporate alcohol into every holiday tradition. In this episode, I will give you 10 tips to help you stay sober during the holiday season.
Fri, November 18, 2022
In this episode, we delve into the concept of rock bottom and its relevance to staying sober. Many believe that hitting a dramatic low point is necessary to maintain sobriety, such as experiencing a DUI, losing a job, or facing legal troubles. However, simply having these external consequences doesn't guarantee long-term recovery. I remember questioning my own rock bottom, comparing it to others in recovery. But what I realized is that rock bottoms aren't definitive; they're more like muddy bottoms that we can keep digging deeper into. I share my personal story of a three-year bender, the moment I agreed to go to rehab, and the transformative experience with my mother. It was her unwavering love that finally anchored my "why" to quit drinking. I came to understand that finding your personal motivation, your own "why," is more powerful than any rock bottom event. Rather than waiting for a devastating low, it's crucial to pause and reflect on the lines we've already crossed, the promises we've broken, and the voids we've left in our lives. By recognizing the evidence of our past actions, we can choose to stop digging and start building a solid foundation for a better future. Remember, you are capable of change and worth the effort. Join me on this journey of self-discovery and growth. This would be a great episode if you are asking yourself any of the following questions: Do I need to hit rock bottom to get sober? How can I get sober? How can I stop relapsing? What can I do to break free of my addictions?
S1 E4 · Fri, November 11, 2022
In this episode, we dive deep into the transformative power of forgiveness. I share my personal journey of forgiveness and how it has played a pivotal role in my life. One crucial lesson I've learned is the importance of recognizing patterns. By understanding the repeating mistakes in our lives, we can break free from harmful cycles and find healing. I can't stress enough the significance of seeking professional help, like therapy when processing past resentments and trauma. It provides invaluable support and guidance on our path to forgiveness. Acknowledging and fully feeling the emotions associated with the harm done is essential. It allows us to release the pain and make room for healing and growth. Empathy is another key element in the forgiveness process. Putting ourselves in the shoes of those who have hurt us helps foster understanding and compassion. But let's not forget, forgiveness starts from within. We must learn to forgive ourselves for our own mistakes and shortcomings. It's a personal journey of self-acceptance and self-love. Remember, forgiveness isn't easy, and it takes time. Each person's journey is unique, but by embracing forgiveness, we can experience true liberation and find happiness in sobriety." This would be a great episode if you are asking yourself any of the following questions: How can I forgive others for things they have done to me? How can I forgive myself for my past? How can I move on from my past? Do I have to forgive myself before I can forgive others? How can I get sober? What can I do to break free of my addictions?
S1 E3 · Fri, November 04, 2022
In this episode, I want to start the discussion on the importance of forgiveness and specifically tackling the difficult challenges of facing our past, acknowledging what we have done wrong, and the steps we can to do begin to start repairing the relationships that we have damaged. In my journey towards sobriety, I learned a powerful lesson in forgiveness from my friend Dan. After years of destructive behavior, I finally faced my past and sought forgiveness from those I had wronged, including Dan. I expected anger and rejection, but instead, I received a warm hug and genuine happiness from him. Dan had forgiven me long ago, valuing our friendship above holding a grudge. We spent hours reminiscing and laughing together. His forgiveness opened my heart to forgive others and myself. Leaving their home, I realized that holding grudges denies others the same gift I received. It inspired me to begin the journey of forgiveness for others and myself. Facing our past, seeking forgiveness, and making amends are crucial steps toward healing. It allows us to let go of guilt and shame, preventing relapse and freeing ourselves from the burden of the past. Remember to create a list of those you've wronged, including financial debts, and approach the process with a realistic plan. Embrace the opportunity to become a better person through forgiveness. This would be a great episode if you are asking yourself any of the following questions: How can I get sober? What can I do to break free of my addictions? How can I ask for forgiveness for my mistakes? What is the best way to make amends after getting sober? Will people forgive me for the things I did during my addiction?
S1 E2 · Fri, October 28, 2022
In this episode, we dive into the concept of finding your purpose or "Why" for getting sober and the pitfalls of the common belief that you must get sober for yourself. It's crucial to understand why you started drinking, why you continued despite the negative consequences, and why you want to quit. I share my own journey of initially getting sober to make my mother proud, even though I struggled with feeling unworthy of a better life. I believe that motivation can come from various sources, like the love for your children or the desire to be a better partner. However, I caution against placing conditions on sobriety based on others' responses, as it shifts responsibility and potential blame. Taking ownership of your drinking and recovery is key. We discuss the importance of getting your "why" out of your head and onto paper whether it is just writing it out or creating a vision board. Then you can prioritize your motivations and goals, avoid overwhelming yourself, and tackle obstacles head-on. In my own experience, I've grown into someone I'm proud of, staying sober out of self-love and the desire for continuous personal growth. Join me in this episode as we explore the power of finding your purpose on your sober journey. This would be a great episode if you are asking yourself any of the following questions: How can I get sober? Do I have to get sober for myself? Can I get sober for someone else? What can I do to break free of my addictions?
S1 E1 · Fri, October 21, 2022
In the first episode of the "Sober and Happy" podcast, I share my personal journey of sobriety and discuss the potential pitfalls of focusing too much on substances and the recovery model of avoidance. We discuss my experiences of going through rehab and immersing myself in Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), diligently working the steps, and actively participating in the community. Despite staying sober, I found myself increasingly depressed and anxious. I realized that my focus on alcohol, relapse prevention, and constant vigilance created a mental state of fragility and limited my enjoyment of life and that I needed to shift my focus from the dangers of alcohol to the sober life I want to live. Although we should use common sense precautions to avoid high-risk situations, fixating on the obstacles increases the likelihood of encountering them. This realization helped me reshape my identity and I am no longer defined solely by being an alcoholic but by my aspirations, relationships, and personal growth. I invite you to join me on this journey of self-discovery, where I offer tools and insights for living a sober and happy life. This would be a great episode if you are asking yourself any of the following questions: How can I get sober? Can I get sober without Alcoholics Anonymous? How can I stop relapsing? What can I do to break free of my addictions? Is sobriety boring?
Trailer · Fri, October 21, 2022
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