Today I want to talk about Being in Uncertainty. 

I was originally going to talk about something different but with the news of the virus being on the upswing in almost every state (and around the world) and with that, delays in returning to the office and putting a return to the classrooms in question, I know this is something that would be helpful for everyone.

It’s been quite the year of uncertainty for everyone with Covid. We weren’t sure if our family or friends would stay healthy. We dealt with shortages of goods, services, HOMES! Parents learned to do double duty as teachers. Kids gave up sporting events. And we all sequestered in our homes feeling isolated and UNCERTAIN.

And in the work context, many of us were thrown into virtual work. In person meetings turned into Zoom. Some people lost their jobs altogether leaving them in uncertainty as to when hiring would even restart. 

It’s been a year of over-the-top uncertainty. But the truth is, our lives and our careers are ALWAYS uncertain. No matter how hard we plan or how faithfully we follow that plan or how hard we work or whatever, we are not always in control of what happens to us.

And while we all know that the future is uncertain. That we can’t know what it waiting for us up ahead, we’re always surprised and unsettled when the unexpected happens. And that’s when uncertainty flares up, right? When we are suddenly forced to deal with the unexpected. And I would say that most of the time it’s not only when the unexpected happens but more specifically, the unwelcome thing happens.

Covid. The layoff. The reorg. The new boss. And when it happens, we feel uncertain.

But what IS uncertainty exactly?

I looked up the Webster's definition and it wasn’t helpful. It described it as a “state of being uncertain.” Wikipedia’s was right on point though. It described it as a ‘Measurement of risk. A state of limited knowledge where it is impossible to exactly describe the existing state or a future outcome; where some possible outcomes have an undesired effect or could represent a significant loss.’  

Interesting right?

So, when we’re uncertain, it’s really because we’re looking at the thing that just happened and not able to know, with certainty, what our future will bring.

That’s because right behind the uncertain is a feeling of being out of control. We no longer feel that the things we used to be able to count on – our routines, our plans, our daily habits. Now we’re living in a different reality. One we didn’t create. One where we’re not in charge of everything that might unfold. And one that might not turn out the way we want.

Uncertainty creates a feeling of being out of control which makes us uncomfortable and at worst, fearful. When we experience uncertainty, most of us try to reduce this feeling of discomfort by trying to take control. 

For example, one of my clients, when faced with nonstop rumors of a major reorganization that was thought to be imminent, dealt with it by spinning up an aggressive job search. Unable to deal with the anxiety of waiting to see what might happen and whether it could actually work in her favor, she soothed herself by applying for job after job after job, telling herself that if change was coming, she’d rather be the one to choose it instead of having it foisted off on her.

This is of course not the reason to do something as important as changing jobs. The truth is underneath her feverish applications was a deep need for

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